As complex as women are, there is a code to us. Not a cheat code, a compatibility code. Once you understand what kind of woman you’re dealing with, everything becomes much clearer.
I’m not just a woman.
I’m a hot girl, a badd bitch if you will.
And being a hot girl isn’t about looks alone. It’s about standards, taste, and running a tight program with men, because experience teaches you that if you don’t, your time will be wasted. Most men want access to beautiful women without wanting to match the effort it takes to maintain them.
Hot girls and so-called high-maintenance women aren’t unreasonable. We’re just realistic about dating dynamics. We know men desire us for our looks and often don’t take us seriously at first. So yes, we make them work for it. The only men who take issue with high standards are the ones who can’t meet them. Which is why if you’re a man who can’t afford a hot girl—emotionally, financially, or energetically—then stop reading. This isn’t for you.
If you want a down-to-earth, sneakers-to-the-bar girl, pursue her. But if you’re approaching women in heels, with polished hair, fresh manicures, and impeccable style, understand that what you’re seeing requires effort—and effort expects effort back. So, if you’re a man who is willing to put in the effort, then keep reading. This is how you seal the deal with a hot girl.
Fine Print: Let me be clear, sealing the deal can mean many things. A second date. A night together. A relationship. A marriage. That’s your business. These are simply some tips to make any of those outcomes more likely.
1. Be A Man With A Plan.
Don’t ask a hot girl what she wants to do. Have a plan. Tell her when you want to meet and where you want to take her, and ask whether she wants to be picked up. That level of intention is attractive. You’re already winning before the date even starts.
And understand this: women are researchers. Most of us will know a lot about you before we meet. So do your research too. It’s incredibly attractive when I can tell a man has actually read something I wrote or has taken the time to learn about my work. It separates you from men who want access and makes it clear you’re interested in more than just my body.
2. Don’t Call Me Sexy. Impress Me.
All women love compliments—when they’re genuine and well-timed.
If you’re approaching her on an app, your first message should never be generic or thirsty. When a woman already leads with hotness, pointing it out tells her nothing new. If you like her eyes, say that. If you like her style, say that. Be specific and tasteful.
Under no circumstances should you call her sexy.
Women like me—and my other baddie friends—hate being called sexy outside of very specific contexts: the bedroom, a club fit, nudes. Otherwise, it feels like you just want to fuck, which is probably true, but until that sentiment is felt on both sides, just omit the sexually charged compliments from your vocabulary.
When you meet a hot girl in person, you should compliment her appearance within the first five minutes. Ten minutes max—and that’s pushing it! She didn’t roll out of a yoga class to meet you. She spent time getting ready. That effort deserves acknowledgment.
If you don’t say anything, she’ll notice.
And yes, she will talk shit about you in the group chat.
3. If I Look Materialistic, Why Would You Approach Me With No Materials?
This should be obvious, but it still needs to be said:
Women who care deeply about how they look understand material reality.
It doesn’t mean we are gold diggers. We’re not expecting yachts or black cards. What we do expect is a man who understands what it costs to look good and respects that investment.
I’ve dated men who weren’t rich but still understood one simple rule: if you’re not adding to my life, you’re not staying.
There are plenty of women who pride themselves on being low-maintenance and believing in 50/50. Hot girls are not those women. And that’s not a flaw, it’s a preference. One you can opt into or walk away from.
4. It’s The Thought—and The Flowers, That Count.
Most women—not just hot ones—love flowers and gifts. Flowers are alive. They last. They remind her of you every day until they die. They make women feel feminine, seen, and chosen.
But don’t just buy any flowers. Know the woman you’re buying them for. Her favorite colors. Places she loves to travel. Some countries even have signature flowers; details like that matter.
Although I’m a hot girl, I’m also a nerd. I adore comic books and graphic novels. One man once gifted me Neil Gaiman’s special edition of Death. When I tell you it made me want to jump his bones, I mean it.
Gifts don’t need to be expensive.
They need to be thoughtful.
5. You Snooze, You Lose.
This might be the most important rule of all: Be Consistent!
If you already know a girl likes you, you’ve done the hard part. Consistency is where most men fall short.
We like busy men, just not men who are too busy for us. If you can’t send a simple ‘good morning,’ ‘good night,’ or ‘how are you?’ once a day, then I’m not the one for you.
I’ve dated men who own Fortune 500 companies. Men with children. Men with lives fuller than most. Every single one still found time to check in daily.
It’s rare for someone to have a valid excuse for complete inconsistency, and an undeniably attractive woman is constantly being approached, so if you snooze, you lose.
Hot girls aren’t asking for too much. We’re asking you to be realistic. If this feels like a lot, that’s okay. Hot girls aren’t for everyone—and everyone isn’t for us. But if you want to date one, there are things to consider.
Now you may ask:
Happy Dating and good luck out there.